Work, work, work, work, work....

There is a ginormous hunk of life taken up by working to get paid. Working to be able to live. Working to help others. Working to change lives. Working to survive. Lately it's all I can think about. I recently changed jobs. I left good pay, insurance, and a pension to get out of the very stressful and thankless job that is Emergency Medicine. I left it for very little, as all I could think about was moving on, doing anything else. I thought anything else that kept me from the constant fight or flight response that I had been living in would be worth the pay cut. I underestimated the exact amount of cut I would take...which was about two thirds of my former wages, gone. The new job isn't the worst by any means. It's simple. Incredibly easy. Boring in comparison to EMS. I don't have to drive in bad weather. I don't have to deal with awful, disgusting situations. I don't have to worry if I'd get sleep at night or if I'd have a late transfer or call. It truly is a relief to get real sleep, to not worry so much. Unfortunately, the job I have now does not pay enough to get by. So not only am I less than stimulated, but I can barely afford my bills. Which really puts a damper on showing up and performing my job, knowing it's not nearly enough to support the life I live. And I live a modest life. My husband and I are paycheck to paycheck people, we enjoy our home, we enjoy doing things occasionally. But like most middle class workers these days, we get by with little to put away. And that's enough for me. I don't need a lot to be happy. SO! I need to make a change. Either a change of job entirely, going for something else full time, going back to EMS part-time and hoping to get enough hours to scrape by (which I could probably make part time what I make full time here) or trying something else part time. I'd try to do this job and a part-time job but unfortunately I don't have a steady schedule to be able to work around, and I don't think it would be fair to ask my current job to work around another place of employment. Should I go back to college? Should I try to find a new trade? Go back to EMS? I don't know. I'm neck deep in confusion and I wish there was a lifeline to call to give me advice or the right answer. As they say in one of my favorite novels, though..."The world is not a wish granting factory." I'm trying to make the best of what I have, and trying to keep my head above water. I don't have a clue what to do. As much as I want to sound deep and philosophical...I feel completely and utterly screwed.